This may be a tough one….

My wife and I watched a movie a few days ago that kind of hit me and stayed with me… even writing this. It was a film called May December, and I guess it’s loosely based on the Mary Kay Letourneau case.

For those not familiar,  in a nutshell, she was a teacher who hooked up with one of her students back in the 90s. The relationship began when he was 13, and she was a married woman with her own children. They ended up having 3 children together.

It was a good film, but also VERY uncomfortable,  for me at least. I was a victim of similar abuse, and I found myself cringing,   totally relating to what was going on. The awkwardness, the uncertainty,  the degradation of one’s mind and mental state. Been there, done that. It still affects me to this day.

PTSD… I think that’s what it falls under. Didn’t really see what was going on, but I went along for the ride. The road to my adulthood full of potholes, wrong turns, and u-turns. Constantly spinning wheels. Not until I was much older, I realized what was going on….what was happening. What was happening to me.

I now see what’s going on. I have a better idea to fix what was broken. The alienation, awkwardness,  uncomfortable feelings related to the unspoken wonder and judging of my relationship…neither one of us having to really explain. But all that aside… I know what needs to be done. For myself and ANYONE going through anything like this:

Precontemplation

Contemplation

Preparation

Action

Maintenance

Communication and help from those who are willing is key. We are valuable and can’t let others rob us of our innocence, or mental state, our lives. Gotta be who we are inside…be happy, be free.